Qixi and incense: the use of incense on ancient China's Valentine's Day

I. The undertone of Qixi: qiqiao is not only about romance

Calling Qixi outright "ancient China's Valentine's Day" captures only half the truth.

The most original central figure of Qixi isthe Weaving Maiden, and the earliest festival custom isqiqiao (praying for needlecraft skill). Zong Lin of the Southern Dynasties records in The Record of the Seasons of Jing and Chu: "The seventh day of the seventh month is the night when the Herd Boy and the Weaving Maiden meet. On this evening, women of the household knot colored threads, thread seven-holed needles—sometimes made of gold, silver, or brass—and set out melons and fruit in the courtyard to pray for needlecraft skill."—Women knotting colored threads, threading seven-holed needles, and arranging melons and fruit in the courtyard: what they sought was craftsmanship, not marriage.

By the Tang dynasty, the palace began to favor grand display. Wang Renyu of the Five Dynasties records in Remnants of the Kaiyuan and Tianbao Eras that on Qixi in the palace, "towers and halls were woven from brocade, a hundred chi high, able to hold several dozen people; melons, fruit, wine, and roasted meats were set out, and seats were arranged to sacrifice to the two stars, the Herd Boy and the Weaving Maiden," while palace ladies "each held a nine-holed needle and five-colored thread and threaded it facing the moon." The Five Dynasties and Song continued this pattern and added another name—the qiqiao tower。

Meng Yuanlao's A Record of Dreaming of Splendor in the Eastern Capital describes Qixi in Northern Song Bianjing: on the evenings of the sixth and seventh, "wealthy households mostly built colored towers in their courtyards"; the market sold "mohele" (i.e., Mahoraga, a small clay or wax figurine, both a Qixi seasonal toy and an offering), "floating on water," "grain boards," and "flower melons," as well as "seed sprouts" grown by "soaking mung beans, adzuki beans, and wheat in water in porcelain vessels." Children and young women turned out across the city.

So where does incense come in?

In thearrangement. Whenever melons and fruit were "set out in the courtyard," an incense table was invariably placed in front. The reason qiqiao is a "prayer" is that there is someone prayed to—the Weaving Maiden. To speak with a deity, one must first light incense. This follows the same logic as moon worship at Mid-Autumn and ancestor rites at Qingming.

II. Boudoir incense matters: sachets, incense powder, and incense bands

What truly touches on "love" at Qixi is the sachet.

Sachets were called in antiquity "rongxiu," "xiangdai," or "peiwei" and were items carried on the person. The Book of Rites, Inner Regulations records that children serving their parents wore "collar cords and sandals," among which the "cord" was a sachet-like ornament; Zheng Xuan of the Han commented that it meant "wearing aromatic substances." After the Wei and Jin, sachets became something men and women could give each other—Fan Qin's "Poem of Pledged Love" says, "How to express earnest affection? A sachet tied behind the elbow," a line that fixed the sachet's nature as a love token.

This tradition flourished even more in the Tang. The palace had a system of bestowing clothing and sachets at the Dragon Boat Festival (a Tang silver sachet was unearthed from the crypt of Famen Temple; inside the sphere is a gimbal ring, so no matter how it turns, the incense cup within always faces upward—a pinnacle of Tang craftsmanship). Among the people, women made them themselves—at Qixi, one major use of the "skillful hands" prayed for was making sachets and embroidering fragrant pouches.

An easily overlooked detail:A sachet holds not only aromatic materials but also heartfelt feelingWhat goes in the pouch, how much, and how many stitches—all of it is a message. Song dynasty notebooks often contain scenes of "gifting a sachet," usually a private exchange not meant for open display—precisely because it is private, it becomes a token of love.

III. How to Choose Incense for Qixi: Clear, Sweet, Soft

The incense of Qixi is different from the "clear" of Mid-Autumn and the "reverent" of Qingming; its keyword isSoft。

Here's a straightforward recipe you can use directly (mix after grinding, about 30 g per batch):

• Agarwood powder 6 g
• Old mountain sandalwood powder 9 g
• Agastache rugosa 6 g
• Nardostachys 3 g
• Clove 2 g
• Borneol 0.3 g (optional)

This blend is sweet without being cloying, cool without being harsh; in a sachet it holds its scent for three to four weeks, and it also works for indirect-heat burning. If you want to keep it simple, agarwood incense sticks or incense seals work just as well—Incense materials are only the means; setting up the table is what makes it Qixi。

Reference prices for incense materials: herbal spices like Agastache rugosa, Nardostachys, and clove are very cheap—a few dozen yuan buys enough for a dozen or more sachets; agarwood powder is priced by the gram, with Star Island series at about 50–500 yuan/g, and Hui'an series wild sinking-grade material at 3000–10000 yuan/g; old mountain sandalwood powder is about 10–60 yuan/g.Prices follow the market; for reference only. You don't need top-grade agarwood for sachets; mid-grade Star Island powder is enough, and the budget you save is better spent on a nice piece of fabric.

IV. Recreating the past tonight: how to make a furnace of Qiqiao incense

Following the approach in Dongjing Menghua Lu and adapting it to modern home conditions, here is a timetable you can follow:

1. Set up the table at dusk.In a courtyard or on a balcony, facing the moon (Qixi has a first-quarter moon, toward the west), spread a cloth and arrange melons, fruit, and qiaoguo (ready-made is fine).
2. Set up the censer.Place a small censer or an electric incense warmer in the center of the table. Families with children can switch to a smokeless electric warmer for safety.
3. Threading needles to pray for skill.Prepare needles and five-colored thread, and thread the needle facing the moon; whoever succeeds is said to "gain skill." This is the most participatory part of the whole set, and children will vie to play.
4. Burn a furnace of incense.One incense stick, or a piece of agarwood over indirect heat. No need for long; twenty minutes is enough.
5. Make a sachet.Cut the fabric into two pieces, sew three sides, fill with incense powder, and close it up. Two people each make one and swap—this directly brings over the ancients' "sachet as a token of love," and is far more interesting than a bought gift.

Last Qixi, a longtime client who works in design brought his girlfriend to the shop to choose incense materials, and they made two sachets: one filled mainly with Agastache rugosa and Nardostachys, fresh and crisp; the other mainly with agarwood and sandalwood, sweet and smooth. He told me that only after finishing did he realize "blending incense is much harder than picking a lipstick"—hard because you have to consider what the other person likes, not what you like. In the end, the two sachets hung in the same car.

For the specific method of making a sachet, plus the fabric and spice shopping list, see the separate articleDIY Sachet Tutorial。

Frequently Asked Questions

What are the customs of burning incense on Qixi?

Qixi is not a formal sacrifice, so the rules are relaxed. The common practice is to set up a table in the courtyard, arrange melons and fruit, and burn one censer of incense (one or three incense sticks are both fine), then thread a needle under the moon to pray for skill. The key point is "offerings first, incense after"—set out the offerings before lighting the incense. For a home version, an electric incense burner works just as well; the important thing is to set up the table and sit down together.

Is it appropriate to give a sachet on Qixi?

Very appropriate, and it fits the occasion better than giving flowers. The sachet is one of China's oldest personal tokens of affection; Fan Qin's "Poem of Settled Love" from the Wei and Jin dynasties already says, "How to express my earnest feelings? A sachet tied behind the elbow." For the method, it is recommended that the two people each make one and exchange them, with the spices matched to the other person's preference (for those who like fresh scents, use patchouli and nard as the base; for those who like sweet and mellow scents, use agarwood and sandalwood as the base). The scent lasts about three to four weeks, after which the core can be replaced.

Can agarwood be put in a Qixi sachet?

Yes, and agarwood is the best fixative—it lasts long and smells clean, and can "lock in" the scents of the other spices. But you don't need top-grade material: mid-grade Sin Chew agarwood powder (about 50–500 yuan/gram) is enough, and 3–6 grams is sufficient for one sachet. Note that agarwood belongs to wild populations listed in CITES Appendix II, so pay attention to source and compliance information when purchasing.

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